Learn to recognise the 4 interpersonal styles plus 11 ways to enhance your interpersonal skills

by Sridevi.A
(India)




Good team building is possible only with good interpersonal skills among the members of the team.

People are the most important resource of any organization. To be successful in business one needs to possess human skills in abundance. Interpersonal skills or Human skills refer to the ability of a person to work well with other people in the group.

Success in business is as much based upon using inter-personal skills effectively as it is based upon using professional skills. Positive interpersonal skills increases the productivity of the organizations as the conflicts are negligible.

People who have excellent interpersonal skills can generally control their feelings that arise during conflicts, respond appropriately instead of being flabbergasted by emotion

Situation:

For instance, if we have to interrupt someone who is preoccupied with a task in order to obtain information needed immediately, it is recommended that a professional utilizes a courteous approach with language such as, "Excuse me, are you busy? I have an urgent matter to discuss with you if you have the time at the moment.

Every individual has a personal style contour - specific personality characteristics that determine their preferences.

Basically there are 4 types of personality styles:

Challengers - who appreciate action and exciting activity

Casuals - who appreciate creativity and relationships

Stabilizers - who appreciate law and order

Visionaries - who appreciate innovation and perceptiveness

By understanding the personal style of a person, an individual can quickly build a rapport and interact with others. Rapport building indicates that an individual can build a relationship with another; and "Interaction” indicates that two or more individuals can do things together.

The 2 ways to quickly identify the personal style of others is :

1. Listening to the words of others
2. Observing how they dress

Challengers possess the get-up-go attitude and use words that relate to competition, bravery, energy, incentives. They dress casually.

Causals use words that suggest the notions of acceptance, friendship, principles, peace, and sharing. They tend to dress fashionably.

Stabilizers use words that indicate budgets, constancy, liability, safety, and security. They tend to dress formally.

Visionaries use words that indicate examination, ability, explanations, research, and solutions. They tend to dress functionally.

If an individual can adapt their personal style to another's without losing their own, they can increase the possibility of success in entertaining, informing, convincing, persuading, and negotiating to close transactions for mutual benefit.



Understanding personal styles is the key to balancing inter-personal skills with professional skills.

Some ways to build a pleasing and positive personality which in turn enhance our interpersonal skills are:

1. Trust
“To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved” George MacDonald

Mutual trust is the belief that we can rely on each other to achieve a common purpose.

The key elements in building trust are:

• Being honest and fair
• Empathy
• Sharing important information pertaining to oneself
• Avoid using abusive words
• Fulfilling promises

To build a relationship, the first prerequisite is to build trust. Trust is not built in a day. It is over a period of time that we build it. Empathy is one such thing that allows us to create bonds of trust.

2. Accept Responsibility
When we accept responsibility, it represents our maturity

3. Be considerate and courteous

4. Think win –win
We need to create a win / win situation & the result shall culminate into happiness, prosperity, enjoyment & satisfaction because they are not thinking of themselves alone.

5. Choose what you say rather than say what you choose.

There is a saying “ A fool speaks without thinking; a wise man thinks before speaking.” A spoken word is like an arrow shot which cannot be retrieved. So we need to watch our words.

6. Be a good listener
When we listen to others it shows we care for them and they feel important. Thus the person is motivated and is more receptive to our ideas.

7. Sincere appreciation
Sincere appreciation is a very good motivator as it fulfils human craving to feel important.

8. Accept your mistakes
Accept your mistakes immediately and willingly as mistakes are a part of our learning process.

9. Avoid arguments
Arguing with someone is like fighting a losing battle. It leaves a residual ill will. Instead try to discuss. You may probably reach a concord.

10. Don’t be a gossip monger
Gossip mongers neither have a mind nor a business and hence they do not mind their own business.

11. Turn your promises into commitments
A commitment is a promise that is going to be kept no matter what. Commitment is born out of character and leads to conviction and confidence.

‘Last but not the least, to have a friend you need to be a friend.’

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